None of us can escape the constant news stories of anything and everything Trans oriented. Pretty much all of them involve some kind of demand for change from the general public. It makes no difference if crossdressers agree with any or all of the positions involved. We fall under the transgender umbrella because we basically don’t have our own separate representation. So what about the crossdresser demands from the general public? To my knowledge we don’t have any which is not to be confused with desires. I think crossdressers along with every other person on the planet desire respect but demanding it might be counter productive.
CROSSDRESSER DESIRES
There is little likelihood of a crossdresser lobbying group or movement emerging anytime soon. This primarily due to the privacy desires we all share. We prefer to stay out of the limelight expressing our feminine side without any special attention. We don’t have a list of crossdresser demands but our crossdresser desires are to be treated with respect. Attaining the crossdresser respect and freedoms we desire are not as difficult as you may think. The first step is to give respect to others regardless of their position on an issue.
CROSSDRESSER RESPECT
Keyboard warriors never convince anybody by attacking and shouting down the opposition. They just identify themselves as negative people and alienate others. If their position has merit they should be able to easily explain their logic winning people over. Because the crossdresser lobby does not exist its up to us to achieve the crossdresser respect we desire. It starts with making a good first impression which, does not have to be great. Not making a bad impression can be a start that leads to respect sooner with a little work.
Regardless of the current political climate some things don’t change with election outcomes. Its not likely when a couple clocks me waiting for my table in a restaurant they will jump for joy. Men will typically glance and move on as they are not interested. That is unless they are one of us in which case they will observe very carefully. Women however, will observe, evaluate, and judge based on your presentation. It’s not a bad thing they do it all the time to other women. Crossdresser respect is at play here depending on her impressions of me. If what I am wearing is something she likes and would wear herself its a positive. If she likes my hairstyle and color along with how it works with my skin tone that’s another positive. Wearing the outfit below on night in Las Vegas by myself 3 women bought me a glass of wine. No discussion, dialog or eye contact they just asked the waiter to give me a glass of wine anonymously. He told me who just before they left so I could thank them.
We are all crossdresser ambassadors when we are out and about. I have found that being approachable is a great opportunity to lobby our cause. Most of the time women approach me when I am alone which, must be comfortable to them. Possibly having a bartender nearby gives them a feeling of security in case they change their mind. Most of the time it is just one woman. Sometimes there are two women. I had a mother daughter team a while back. In Las Vegas everyone is visiting so you have that in common starting off. That leads to the inevitable question where are you from?
Once the conversation has started I work in that I am married, have kids, and grand kids. I always volunteer that my wife knows and is accepting which brings the questions. From there on its mostly me explaining how I started and evolved to this point. I explain that I am not transgendered and don’t use the term crossdresser like many others. When we part company she knows the difference which achieves my crossdresser desire without any crossdresser demands.
Oh Micki, you have really opened the gates to what has been the deciding issue for my wife. For twenty years she has been my guide to me becoming more acceptive of my desire to appear more the realistic lady. She has helped in so many ways. The recent over the top demands of the trans community and all the negative news, particularly with transition of children has driven her to have a reset on acceptance of my dressing. A recent cancer discovery and surgery has not allowed me to present as Laurie for weeks. She has even suggested that it may be time to divest of my extensive wardrobe. We had always enjoyed the times and at home, privacy of having date nights or a weekend of all girl time. I now doubt that after recovery I’ll be welcomed in the same way.
Wow! That’s all I can say Laurie but maybe if she reads my post it will help.
Good lick,
Micki
Very Postive Post
Miss Micki…. Yep we are all ambassadors in the CD world. I am a mere rookie when it comes to crossdressing but I try to present a positive image while in public and have not had any issues. As have you, I have been approached multiple times women (as recently as yesterday) who are almost always alone, and engaged in positive small talk that sometimes leads to why am I crossdressed. For me it is an enjoyable experience and I hope so for them as well.
As for the current times, I do not feel threatened or insecure. But now as then, I always am aware of my surroundings (dressed or drab). Just common sense.
The few friends of my who know that I crossdress, are supporting but surprised when they find out that I crossdress. Right, left, left, right, we all have our individual freedoms, pleasures and desires in this wonderful country.
Thanks for the article, Staci…
nothing to argue about with what you wrote. however it seems to me that some of us are in denial about what has led to the negative atmosphere that we have to deal with now i.e. those with no political sense pushed things like tg’s in girl’s sports which just fed those who needed a political issue .
Great article. Great comments as well. Thank you.
Thanks Vickie, I hope people find it helpful.