LIKE MINDED CROSSDRESSERS

I watched a video today from a man who looks like a former military guy talking about men needing a tribe. That being a circle of friends they can count on in good times and bad to be honest and straight forward with them while supportive. The kind that will tell you when you are off base without abandoning you. I immediately started thinking about the group of like minded crossdressers I joined over thirty years ago named CHIC. I have written about CHIC before so won’t go too far into that here. What struck me was when he talked about the need men have for that special tribe because the same applies to crossdressers in my view. We may have even more of a need due to the secrecy that is paramount in our activity.

One aspect many of us enjoyed about the club was that while it was strictly a social club that did not mean that we were not supportive of others personal needs. To the contrary, helpful critiques were commonly shared between members solicited or not but in a tactful way. Newer crossdressers typically make the same mistakes that older ones learned from years ago. Dressing like the hot chick from your high school or a movie star instead of what looks good on you ranks pretty high on the list. We all did it in the beginning and because we are like minded crossdressers will guide the new guy through the process. CHIC even had a founding member Jo Ann that volunteered to bring new members and wives to her home for guidance. Sometimes it would turn into a 12 hour day ending with dinner out in public. Jo Ann was a very accomplished crossdresser and an engineer by trade who paid a great deal of attention to details and techniques which she gladly shared with anyone.

All of the club members supported Jo Ann’s efforts because her setup was so beneficial to those she helped. Even though the ages of club members varied we were like minded crossdressers because we all shared Jo Ann’s feelings about style. Jo Ann provided the luxury of being able to come to her private single family home in guy clothes and be taken on a when, why, and how journey based on her years of experience. I never attended one of her sessions but I believe she started with the makeup because it sets the stage for everything else. Starting with the correct foundation shade based on your skin tone, followed by eye shadow depending on your eye color. Next depending on your hair color and complexion comes the wig. Then trying on different wig styles and colors which is where you will become a like minded crossdresser probably for life.

When the makeup is done instead of telling the person the jet black wig (Elvira) they like is not good you let them choose. Starting with their black wig you show them the problems that color creates like skin flaws and stark contrasts. Then you put the correct wig on them based on their makeup tone with a face flattering style. They will instantly see the difference and will become like minded crossdressers with new skills for life. Most of Jo Ann’s students showed up at their next CHIC meeting looking much better but also like little clones of her which wore off quickly. That said, once they got the skills from Jo Ann it influenced any new style choices they made going forward. Having another crossdresser that you can be honest with and get good feedback is valuable.

The first time a paid to have a makeup lesson done the guy did a great job and asked if I would like to see how it looked with a wig. At first I said no but decided to give it a whirl and was knocked out when I saw the result adding a strawberry blonde did for my makeup. Even so for years I bought darker wigs and after joining CHIC Jo Ann started in on me about wearing lighter colors and shorter styles. I resisted for years wearing shoulder length dark red and ash brown but eventually agreed as I got older which made her happy. I now wear light browns and blond shades mixed with white and gray which minimizes the contrast between my hair and skin tone. Younger people with smooth youthful skin can easily get away with stark contrasts between skin and hair but for many of us that ship has sailed. She was also right about shortening wig length and adding height making me look thinner overall.

Another example of like minded crossdressing is activities and interests you share outside of dressing like the Pink Tee Foursome we had for many years. After a Friday and Saturday night of going out en fem Sundays four of us got together to balance the weekend out with decidedly male activity. In our case it was embarrassing ourselves publicly at one of our favorite Orange County golf courses. Seeing four hairless older men on the golf course doesn’t attract any unusual attention as long as you keep the pace and we always had fun. I even proved to the scientists in the group that it was a fact that my game improved on the back nine after a hot dog and a Coors Light at the turn.

If you get the right like minded crossdressers in your tribe the connection lasts for years regardless of when members inevitably move away for retirements or job transfers. You find ways to get together at convenient locations like Las Vegas sometimes for crossdresser events but other times just as a small group. Other times its just a few people in a small group for unscheduled fun stuff on their own. Last February a couple of current and past CHIC member joined the members of the Rose City “T” Girls in Portland Oregon for a fun weekend. It was a fun weekend mingling with like minded crossdressers from other clubs that have become acquainted previously at various events. I guess everyone enjoyed it because we are doing it again next month with 6 more CHIC members joining this year.